Give In or Give Up
This might sound a bit romantic but I will try to eliminate the cheesy part 🙂
One day I have a chat with my old-friend about his romantic life. He is the type of guy that is always ‘plunge’ in a relationship totally, without hesitation, totally give in (if not a total surrender). He takes a stance that ‘if you want to be happy, really happy, then you must not hold back’ . He is no ‘I only give 60 or 70 % of me so that In case something happen I will not totally loose it’ type. He left himself exposed and of course…be vulnerable, voluntarily. And so far, it takes him nowhere. A bit of happiness but lots of dissapointments. No one stays with him for long.
Some of my other friends then would reminded him of the famous postulate of ‘Do Not Give Yourself Totally’. But, as I analyze (remember that I’m an analyst) I do not againts the ‘total surrender’ strategy. The problem is not entirely in the ‘give in’ part, but in ‘for whom’ part and the ‘when’ part. Certain women, or in fact most women perceive that it is their role to do the ‘give in’ part in the relationship, not the men. Moreover, going over too early saying ‘You have all my heart, I can not fall in love for anyone except you’ will surely make your relationship going over the cliff. I myself will terrified with a women who fell completely with me (if any).
So, it is not wrong to ‘give in’ yourself as long as you are sure about the person, she is sure about you and the timing is right. But, then again, the problem are that the three justified parameters as I have mentioned will never be perfect 100%. So, what is ‘sure’?, what percentage is ‘sure’? If you do not know the answer then it is better to just give up to give in yourself……..